Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Counter-productive Patterns of Speech

These are habits you have, the way you speak that is often a set-up for a let-down; you shoot yourself in the foot. One that comes to mind is called “putting your present intentions in the past tense”. What that means is you want to do something but you put it in the past tense that sounds like you wanted to do it. People will say, “I wanted to ask you,” “what I wanted to say was,” “I was getting ready to say.” When people say to me, “I wanted to ask you”. I often respond , “well, do you still want to ask me?” Because it is curious, if you say “I wanted to ask you, …” it sounds like you don’t anymore. So what you want to do is take the present intentions and put it in the present tense. So instead of saying “I just wanted to ask you …” say, “I want to ask you …” It makes a BIG difference and you have a lot more power.

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