Maximizing Performance Through Applied Common Sense*

One of the things you will want to do if you are going to resolve conflict is to review the way you think about compromise.  If you’re a them vs. us, win - lose, black - white, kind of person then often you think that any kind of compromise is a loss.  Compromise is, you give a little and I give a little, and we make a quid pro quo kind of deal.  But, if you think that anything less than what you want is a loss, then you are going to associate weakness and loss with compromise.  My recommendation is to remember if you are going to resolve conflict, compromise is one of the essential tools to do it.  When you learn to compromise, you are probably going to resolve the conflict and move on. 

One of the things that you want to do if you are going to resolve conflict is you must adjust your view on conflict.  Lots of people think that conflict is bad and therefore, destructive and you must avoid it.  The reality is, conflict is inevitable and it’s what happens with people.  If you understand that it is inevitable, sometimes when you actually resolve conflict, you feel relived; it feels like the air is cleared.  Rather than deciding that conflict is bad, consider that conflict is normal and right on schedule.  If you think that way, you are much more likely to confront it and learn the skills to resolve it.  So conflict is inevitable and you can learn the skills and you’ll get better results.