Maximizing Performance Through Applied Common Sense*

Let someone know that you understand what’s going on. Often when someone is complaining to you or fussing about something, you will want to solve it with the illusion that if you offer up the gospel according to you, and deploy it just in time that you are going to get a “Thank You” note. More than half the time they are going to get more upset. So remember, it is effective to simply say, “I understand.” “I understand how difficult it is.” “I understand how exciting it is.” The more you empathize with people the more they feel understood. The more they feel understood, you can actually begin to solve the problem. So instead of offering up the gospel according to you, simply empathize. When you empathize before you solve it, solutions are actually reached.

Most of the time people are very frustrated because they think that customer service stinks. Part of the reason it stinks is because people are unhappy and the customer service provider doesn’t appear to care. So, therefore, if you are frustrated as a customer you really want two things: first, you want someone to care and give you a sense of understanding that they get it and you want the problem solved. Therefore, if you are in customer service, my recommendation is when you are dealing with the public, try to find out what is going on with them. And if they are frustrated, you can really appreciate why they’re frustrated if you get into their shoes. You can say, “I can certainly see why you are frustrated,” at which point you will calm down their wrath. So show more empathy, it really works!